I really think it’s happening. I’ve tried so adamantly to take it slow but I am seriously intoxicated with him. Maybe it’s his quiet confidence, or the way he calls me baby. I’m not sure. All I know is that lately I’m in another world. One of the girls I work with said to me recently ‘What the hell are YOU smiling about’?’. I played it coy like ‘Just happy is all.’ and she proceeded to make the ‘You are SO full of shit’ face at me. I have a feeling she knows.
I’m usually pretty level headed, that is to say I’m not generally the one to lose myself in these kinds of situations. There’s something highly different about this Man from others I’ve been with. Most of the men I’ve been with were kind of blocked and/or mixed up when it comes to intimacy so Shannon is a welcome change. Also, the uber Irish name is a huge turn on.
I know it’s such a cliche but he really makes me feel beautiful. More so than anyone I’ve ever been with, actually. Like seriously, every molecule in my body is screaming and twisting with feral delight.
This as you might have guessed is kind of turning my brain to mush. Honestly, I’m having a hard time not acting like a drunk teenage girl around him. I told this to my middle aged gay friend and he laughed heartily. He then said ‘ Is this really such a bad thing?.’ I responded ‘Honestly, it’s pretty awesome’. Aside from all the random blushing it truly is. Not that I mind blushing, it just tends to lead to questions.
I’m going to see him today and I’m well past excited about it. We’re going to watch a DVD of our theatre’s production of ‘Arsenic and Old Lace’ which was actually how we first met. He initially wrote me off as a romantic possibility because I had a girlfriend. It didn’t occur to him that I might swing both ways. Flash forward to recently and all it took was a little saucy comment and we were both like ‘Yeah? Okay cool.’.
I’m still trying to take things easy. That said, I’ve already gotten pretty deep. I don’t want to jump the gun but I think I’m falling in love here. So yeah, that’s where I’m at currently.
Pray for me-